I did actually get my Fortune Cookie Soap Box on time – that is, before the launch of the Finding Nemo collection. The whole purpose of the timing is that you get the box before the launch so that you can use the $10 e-voucher you receive on your favourite things from the collection when they drop. Thankfully – spoiler alert – I’m not that enamored by anything from this box. There are a few great scents, and a few nice products, but not necessarily in combinations that suit me. That $10 will no doubt be going towards a couple of lip scrubs, because I finished up a Cotton Candy Fluff Talkin’ Smack lip scrub, and I loved it.
I was super excited when I opened up my box and saw the Finding Nemo/Finding Dory theme filling it to the brim. We’re heading into the cooler months here in Sydney, but I am all about warm summer scents all year round, so it seemed like the perfect combination of season and theme to be a match made in heaven. Not to mention the famously Australian connection with Finding Nemo – it’s always fun to flaunt that connection.
Add to that that packaging and presentation wise, the Fortune Cookie Soap Box has the game locked down. Few other boxes actually adhere so strongly to a theme or manage to make their boxes evoke such strong images of a garden or a winter wonderland or, in this case, some kind of a oceanic trip. I go into these boxes with a lot better mind frame than I would with, say, a Bellabox (my cruel temptress) – I want to love everything.
Look, down to business: What’s in the box? WHAT’S IN THE BOX?
- Shark Bait (Fortune Cookie Soap) – This soap claims to be a fresh blend of sweet oranges, creamy vanilla ice cream and juicy, sandalwood infused strawberries but I just get vague citrus sweetness. Orange creamsicle sort of stuff. These soaps are rubbish for in the shower – they fall apart far too easily – but I use them as hand soaps, so this will get used. I definitely like this better than last quarter’s Guardian of the Forest floral explosion.
- Lil Blue (OCD Hand Sanitiser) – Another monthly staple are the OCD Hand Sanitisers, and I always mention that I appreciate that a portion of the proceeds go towards the International OCD Foundation. I usually love these, and I adore the aesthetic here with the shimmery blue liquid, but I am not getting any of the anjou pear and juicy apples harmonized with plum blossoms, sandalwood and a twist of amber. I’m getting alcohol? I very rarely get that with FCS hand sanitisers. This will still get used at some point, because it’ll get my hands clean and I am an immuno-compromised girl, but it will definitely be pushed towards the back of the sanitiser queue.
- Aqua Scum (Spray Lotion) – While this lotion is essentially useless in terms of moisture, damn, they got that smell right. It is straight up juicy lychee, crisp apple and mouth watering, peach nectar, and it is good. I think I’d get a lot more use from this in actual summer – it doesn’t give moisture, and the spray on action is cooling, which is a little too intense in the current climate.
- Ooooooooh… Baracuda (Lip Gloss) – I was super excited when I thought this was a bright red eyeshadow, or even a pigmented red gloss. Alas, it’s a clear gloss. An okay smelling clear lip gloss, that brings together juicy cantaloupe, crisp green honeydew, and sweet red watermelon, with a splash of lime and a sprinkle of raw cane sugar, but if a little too sickly sweet. But it’s a clear lip gloss, and I don’t really use those. I thought I’d take a photo of it on, for good measure:
- Intervention (Whipped Cream) – I’m on record as finding the whipped cream formula a little too thick and sticky, but it’s winter now, and my skin kind of needs it. Thankfully, this is my favourite smell in the whole box. It smells like heaven (so I’m assuming heaven smells of creamy coconut milk and tangy pineapples). I’m nearly finished my little jar, and I’d get this smell in another product (ooh, a lip scrub!).
- Fin. Noggin. Duuude. (Pedi Bomb) – This arrived totally smashed, but it’s okay because I’m not a huge fan of the weird smell (Lemon-lime fizzy pop floating with orchids and a curl of white chocolate – I get ALL lemon lime, but weirdly muted) and I’m also way too lazy to do proper foot soaks.
- Jellyman (Don’t Be Jelly Soap) – Fortune Cookie Soap’s take on the Lush Shower Jellies, a product I am on record as never having been a fan of. They’re messy, hard to hold, and you end up wasting product when you could just be using a shower gel – this is no different. The smell is the real issue. In the tub, the black cherry, watermelon and frothy iced guava nectar, floating with sliced strawberries and key limes smells like straight up cough medicine. It’s a little better in use, with more of the watermelon coming through, but damn – that black cherry is too much.
- Whale Talk (Perfume) – And finally, an underwhelming perfume – with no label. The notes sound really interesting – strawberries, black currant, jasmine, grapefruit and fresh avocado – but on the skin, it’s got a weird nose-prickling tendency about it. I think the jasmine is a little too prevalent for me, because this could be so pretty if it amped up the fruitier notes without the weirdly over the top floral.
Overall, this is the first box from FCS that has really underwhelmed me. I’m not going to unsubscribe yet, because even though this box is my most expensive subscription, it’s also the most fun, and I want to give it a full year to see how it evens out. I really enjoy Intervention, and there are a few products that will get used up – Jellyman, Shark Bait, Lil Blue, Aqua Scum – but there are also a few straight up flops.
Lets give this box a sad, reluctant 1/5.
Don’t worry, FCS. I still love you. Where did all of your lip scrubs go? I want more,